Is any other area so open to rebranding-through-language as food? In the modern world, the humble bun can be reborn as a muffin, fast food as street food, Shreddies reinvented as “Diamond Shreddies” merely by tilting them by 45 degrees.
This process has been applied, we note with some sadness, to the traditional and surely much-loved gravy boat. Clearly feeling that gravy was too lumpen and 20th Century a concept, John Lewis has rebirthed its traditional table receptacle as a “sauce boat”.
This is to be regretted because, in our opinion, sauces belong in more upright, jug-like containers while the majesty of the elongated bath of a boat is merited by the brown, juicy magnificence of gravy alone. It also implies a downgrading of the importance of gravy – a grievous error because as any good mc knows, the ability to fashion a good gravy is one of those true tests of a chef’s mettle, like making bread and butter pudding and not overdoing the beef.
It hurts us to say this, John Lewis, but we are most disappointed in you. Not angry, you understand, just - disappointed.