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The Book

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Chattering Class

This week's fiddle-faddle

Babybel

Must be MC; they have a waxed jacket, says @heidistephens

Mini M&S 99p cheeses

Compelling

Personalised gifts

Always luggage, never towels. Distinction c/o @ohchrisburton

Cheese toasties

Need a more grown-up name, says @Gary_Bainbridge

America's "grilled cheese"

Not good enough. Implies there's no bread involved

Croque Anglaise

Possible winner from @Robins_Books

Supermarket pasta salads

Always, always rubbish

Andrex's "rollaphobia" campaign

No, we do NOT leave loads of rolls around the house!

Gladioli

Grand and colourful; very MC

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The Periodic Table of the Middle Class
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    « Chattering Class: What you’re all on about | Main | 10 ways to bend the rules MC style »
    Thursday
    Feb072013

    Has the world gone soft? 

    Something revolutionary has descended on the middle class home. What was once the source of banging and crashing by careless children or over zealously sprung cupboards, the soft closure hinge has quietly arrived, installing a little bit of calm into our lives.

    Soft closing kitchen cupboard doors and cutlery drawers, even when given a hearty shove, slow just before impact, and guide themselves to a velvety, noiseless rest. The hush of it all is a beautiful thing to experience. Additionally, the prevalence of the soft close toilet seat had all but eradicated the disturbance issues once endured with those middle of the night visits and what should be referred to as the 'Teenage Slam'.

    Car manufacturers are slow to catch up, only offering soft closures on high end vehicles (you try slamming the door of a Mercedes S-Class - you can't), and we impatiently await the arrival of soft closing internal doors and the panacea of weekend tranquility; the back door that will no longer be at the frame rattling mercy of the summer breeze…

     

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